Seventy-two-year-old Edgar recently picked a
new primary care physician. After two visits and exhaustive lab
tests,
the doctor said Edgar was doing "fairly well" for his
age.
A little concerned about that comment, Edgar couldn't resist asking
the doctor, "Do you think I'll live to be 80?"
The doctor
asked, "Well, do you smoke or drink beer?"
"Oh no," Edgar
replied, "I've never done either."
Then the doctor asked, "Do you eat
rib-eye steaks and bar-b-qued
ribs?"
Edgar said, "No, I've
heard that all red meat is very unhealthful!"
"Do you spend a
lot of time in the sun, like playing golf?" the
doctor
asked.
"No, I don't," Edgar replied.
Then the doctor asked, "Do you
gamble, drive fast cars, or run around
with women?"
"No,"
Edgar said, "I don't do any of those things."
The good doctor
looked at Edgar and said, "Then why the heck do you
want to live to
be 80?"
Do you think my skin is starting to show its age?" "I can't tell. There are too many wrinkles."
How can you tell that you're getting old? You go to an antique auction and three people bid on you!
Are you getting older and wiser? No, he's getting older and wider!
A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood was like: "We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in the woods." The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this in. At last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"
You have to stay in shape. My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is.
One day, a grandpa and his grandson go golfing. The young one is really good and the old one is just giving him tips. They are on hole 8 and there is a tree in the way and the grandpa says, "When I was your age, I would hit the ball right over that tree." So, the grandson hits the ball and it bumps against the tree and lands not to far from where it started. "Of course," added the grandpa, "when I was your age, the tree was only 3 feet tall."
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Do you think my skin is starting to show its age?" "I can't tell. There are too many wrinkles."
How can you tell that you're getting old? You go to an antique auction and three people bid on you!
Are you getting older and wiser? No, he's getting older and wider!
A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood was like: "We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in the woods." The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this in. At last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"
You have to stay in shape. My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is.
One day, a grandpa and his grandson go golfing. The young one is really good and the old one is just giving him tips. They are on hole 8 and there is a tree in the way and the grandpa says, "When I was your age, I would hit the ball right over that tree." So, the grandson hits the ball and it bumps against the tree and lands not to far from where it started. "Of course," added the grandpa, "when I was your age, the tree was only 3 feet tall."
3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 |